The most common British slang terms for diarrhea are “the runs” or “the shits”. These are used throughout the country and everyone will know what you mean when you use these terms. Other terms include the trots, the squits, or the skitters, used primarily in Scotland and parts of Northern England.
There are certainly a handful of widely used terms in Britain for this uncomfortable position that we all find ourselves in from time to time, then.
However, few of them are anywhere near as common as “the runs” or “the shits”.
Most in Britain will have heard of these, whereas some of the others are certainly a good deal more obscure.
Let’s find out more.
What do the British call diarrhea?
The British have a few different terms for diarrhea as and when the need arises.
Obviously, there are more “polite” options, but for the most part you will want to avoid talking about diarrhea at all if you want to be polite!
With that said, the most common and most polite slang term you can use for diarrhea in Britain is “the runs”.
This one is used by just about everyone in the country, and it is not limited by age, generation, or geographical location.
Everyone will understand what you mean when you say you have “the runs” and likely won’t question you anymore!
“I need to use your bathroom, I have a bad case of the runs,” for example.
A similar term which is obviously a bit less polite is “the shits”.
It has precisely the same sense and most if not all will understand that you mean you have diarrhea when you use this term.
“Shit” in itself is profanity as you may well know, so you only want to use this one in familiar company that you know will not be offended by the term.
“I’m going to get the shits if I drink the water here,” for example.
These are the two most common, then, but there are a handful of other terms you might hear depending on where in Britain you are.
“The trots” is a common example of this, used in parts of England and not really elsewhere.
That said, most will at least be able to gather what you mean if they don’t know the term directly.
The same is true of some other similar phrases, such as “the squits” or the “skitters.”
These are more geographically limited.
Let’s see where these terms come from.
Why do the British say “the runs”?
The term “the runs” referring to an attack of diarrhea is first attested as being used in 1962.
It’s not really clear where the term originated or what it first meant.
Most, though, agree it probably simply relates to the fact that an unexpected attack of diarrhea will often “run” down the inside of your trousers or leg.
This lovely image has, for one reason or another, really captured the minds of the British and it has become perhaps the most common slang term, or even euphemism, for diarrhea in British English.
Some think it was originally military slang since the military would often find themselves in situations where they would have to drink unclean water and have no place to go to the bathroom.
This is not clear, though, and the etymology is unfortunately not known for sure.
Why do the British say “the shits”?
This one is a bit easier to explain.
As you likely know, “shit” is a universal slang term in the English speaking world for poo.
It is used everywhere and everyone knows what it means, even if they are too polite to use it themselves.
To say you have “the shits”, though, doesn’t usually simply mean you are having stomach problems, but that you specifically have diarrhea.
The word shit is very old, ultimately appearing around 1,000 years ago and deriving from the Old Norse skita.
When this specific term came into use is hard to say, though it’s older than you might think—certainly older than “the runs” as best we can tell.
Why do the British say “the trots”?
Again, the precise etymology of this particular slang phrase is not known for certain.
It is again constructed in this same way of adding a definite article before the term itself, and this if nothing else is how many will recognize it as referring to diarrhea.
It may be related, again, to an unexpected attack that occurs away from a bathroom, and the shameful “trot” you have to do afterwards.
Lovely!
Why do the British say “the squits”?
Once again, we just don’t know for sure where this one comes from.
You’re less likely to hear it and when you do it’s more likely to be in the north of England.
It is most likely related to the word “squirts”, since again this is what most people experience during attacks of diarrhea.
For some reason, compilers of slang dictionaries preferred not to spend too much time investigating the origins of these terms and thus they may have been forever lost to time!
If you need a polite slang term to describe your condition, then, “the runs” is your best bet.
This one is used just about everywhere or at the very least is very unlikely not to be understood.
That said, if you are feeling creative and perhaps you’re in a certain part of Britain, then a more obscure term like “the squits” or “the trots” might serve you just as well!
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